9 Months

Dear Emma,

Good news! You get to spend your 9-month birthday at home with me! The bad news? It’s because you threw up at daycare this morning AND suddenly developed a fever, so I had to pick you up only 30 minutes after dropping you off. At least you were happy for your monthly photo this morning…although in retrospect, your squirminess and refusal to sit straight up may have been a sign.

You’re napping at the moment after a dose of baby ibuprofen and we’ll be picking up some antibiotics at the pharmacy later this afternoon. Or more accurately — different antibiotics, because you’ve already been getting antibiotic drops in your ears since Friday, when we took you for your 9-month checkup and discovered that the ear infection diagnosed two weeks ago was still hanging around. SIGH. I can’t even express how frustrating it is to see you constantly under the weather in some way, shape, or form. Even when you seem otherwise fine, your runny nose and cough never seem to fully go away. I know this is to be expected from a baby in daycare, and I know that your immune system is improving every day. But sometimes it seems like you are doomed to be sick forever. Today I ended up in tears right along with you, because I couldn’t make you feel better.

But on to better things! In the last month, your abilities have, as per usual, exploded. You started saying “mama” and “dada” on a regular basis and even though you probably don’t really mean it yet, it’s definitely music to my ears to hear the word. (Even when you’re screaming, like you did one night in Charlotte. “Waaaaaaaaaah…dadadada….”) You squeal and grunt when you want something or are pleased with something you did. And your laugh has evolved into different flavors. You still giggle when something really makes you laugh, but now you also do what I can only describe as a chuckle — a quick “heh heh” that never fails to make me smile.

You are also starting to take slightly longer naps, which doesn’t seem like a big deal, but let me tell you: when you’ve been a serial 45-minute napper for months, an hour and a half feels like a long time! Last weekend your morning nap was two hours and 15 minutes and I started to wonder if someone had swapped my baby out for a different one. (And yes, I kept checking the monitor to make sure you were breathing. It seems this is something all moms do.) The downside of this is that I think you’re also starting to transition from 3 naps per day to only 2…but if those two are longer, I think it’s a fair trade.

But by far your biggest accomplishment has been learning to pull yourself all the way up to standing. Two weeks ago you couldn’t do it, and now it feels like you’ve always been able to. You pull up on everything — your crib, your bookcase, the coffee table, your car seat. Yesterday you even pushed yourself up on a giant package of toilet paper while we were unpacking groceries. Whatever you can find is perfectly acceptable. You’re an equal opportunity pull-upper.

Every day you become more observant, more aware of the world around you, and more adventurous. You bonked your head pretty good after a fall at daycare one day, and if you didn’t have Dad or me shadowing nearly every move, you would have taken several head-first swan dives off the couch by now. It seems your desire to explore is running ahead of the development of any sort of self-preservation instinct!

By far our biggest adventure this month was going to Charlotte for a week to see my half of your family. Everyone was there — Gima and Grandfather, Uncle David, Uncle Brian and Aunt Cindy, and your two cousins Daniel and Lucas. And Aunt Katie and Uncle Joel even flew in from Seattle so that our visits could overlap! We gathered on the front porch for a family photo that we’ll all enjoy for years to come. Although this photo will probably seem funny to you someday because it doesn’t include any of your future siblings and/or cousins, it seems funny to me because my family is so much bigger now! What was a family of six for so many years has now doubled in size. Amazing!

We also drove up to Durham one day so you could meet your Great-Grandmother and I’m so, so glad we did. She is 98 years old and you are the first great-grandchild she has been able to meet. I haven’t seen her as excited about anything in a very long time as she was about seeing you. It made all of us — Great-Grandmother, Gima, and me — very, very happy.

During the first quarter of my freshman year at college, my family came to Atlanta for the weekend to visit. I was so homesick and spent so much time crying that your Grandfather came back the very next weekend to take me home to Charlotte for a few days. That was 1996, and I guess since then I had forgotten what it felt like to miss your family that much. But now I remember. Our whole week in Charlotte was fantastic and went by far too fast. For the first time in 17 years, I actually cried when it was time to leave North Carolina.

Emma, having you has made me realize just how important family really is. You’re here, and you’re the most important part of it. You and Dad. Going back to Charlotte with a child of my own made me think about a lot of things, and who knows where that might lead. But wherever we go, you guys will always be my home.

Love,
Mama