I didn’t realize the mere mention of my 80s movie knowledge, or lack thereof, would get more comments than anything ever has, except the topic of Jose himself. And nope, sorry, he’s not open for commenting again.
Question of the day: Does high school clique-like behavior end when you leave high school? Or is it just something that always happens, whether at school or in community activities or at work? I’d like to think that being in the “inner circle” doesn’t matter once we grow up and become adults. But maybe not. I don’t know.
In the latest instances, one at work and one in a community activity, I’ve decided to just let it go. Taking it personally makes me stressed. Worrying about it makes me tired.
Lately I’ve been in a very “me” mood. (I suppose you could call it selfish, but I don’t think it’s always selfish to put your own needs and wants at the top of the list.) I’ve been thinking a lot about what makes me happy, and what I’m not satisfied with. The good news is that for the most part, I am exceedingly happy with my life at the moment. This was especially apparent on Saturday night, when I went to see Katie.
Because she was traveling with a group from my family’s church in Charlotte, I knew quite a few of the other people in the group. After greeting them, they inevitably asked me something like: “So, do you still like living in Houston?” My answer is always a little different than what they expect.
No, I don’t like living in Houston. I don’t like the weather. I don’t like how flat it is. I don’t like that there are no tall trees, and I don’t like that things tend to be a brownish-yellow color instead of a nice, rich green. I don’t like that the air always smells slightly like chemicals. I don’t like that the highways are littered with run-down strip malls and dingy strip clubs.
So why don’t I move?
Because while I don’t like the city, I do like — really, really like — the life that I have in Houston. The life that I have partly built, and partly stumbled into. I like my friends. I like my job, most of the time. (Come on, nobody likes their job all the time.) I like my soccer team, and my softball team, and the running community that I have gotten to know. I like the little bit of photography that I do. I like having season tickets to the Astros.
Sure, I could do most, if not all, of those things in another city. But I haven’t. I do them here. And I like them here. I don’t really like Houston, but I like my life here.
For the first time, I’m starting to think of Houston as a long-term location for me. For the first time, I don’t see myself leaving anytime soon.
Yes, cliques and networks still form, and will form all your life. After GT’s cult-of-leadership societies, I would have guessed you realized that cliquish behavior does go beyond high school. No, you don’t need to worry about it if you’re not interested. Yes, I do think people advance, get recognized, get informed of new opportunities at a much greater rate if they’re part of a “inner circle” or have formed a network of contacts (call it a clique, if you will).
Unfortunately, the cliques still form…the big difference for me, as an adult – I don’t give a sh*t about them! 🙂
Definitely cliques still exist. I mean my team is basically divided in separate sides of the hall. The left side guards their knowledge and holds on to information. The right side just does all the crappy, boring work wonder when we’re ever going to make a difference. 🙂
Glad you’re going to be here a while.
vic
Time to buy a house, or perhaps a condo 🙂
I’m learning – especially when dealing with women – there are two groups of people after high school:
1. The people who weren’t part of the “IN” crowd but weren’t the outcasts either. These are the more well adjusted adults.
2. Then you have the people who never really get out of High School mentality and if they weren’t popular in high school, but wanted to be, they carry that chip on their shoulder the rest of their lives and hate the people who seem to be liked.
I find this more so with women, don’t know about men. They never make much sense anyways 🙂
Wow. I could have written the penultimate 4 paragraphs word for word.
Not sure I can agree that I can’t see myself leaving, though–my nearest relative is almost 1200 miles away, and my only sibling was due with her first child yesterday. I’m homesick.
But, it would be harder than I would have expected, I think.
Learned a new word today – had to look up “penultimate” … Edwin thought I was full of it when I wrote that so thanks that I’m not the only one who sees that.