ten: i keep thinking about ron and buzz’s wedding. i want to get married. someday, you know. it looks like fun. stressful, but fun.
nine: this morning my suspicions were confirmed–my computer hates me, and the flight mechanics lab hates me. friday evening as i left work at 6:00, i started a script that should have kicked off 31,000 monte carlo runs. i came in this morning, and how many actually ran? 500. that’s right, 1/62, 1.6%, a really freaking small fraction of the total. and why didn’t they run? i have no idea. the same script is running perfectly now, and i didn’t change anything, so i can only assume that my computer burped right after i left work on friday. and stopped doing what it was supposed to be doing, as it is prone to do. seriously. my computer is like a big baby. it has to be watched at all times or it decides to act up. grr.
but i digress.
eight: a cold front is supposed to make a last gasp, but i think summer has arrived. it is damn humid outside.
seven: at what point do friends become faraway friends? at what point do you lose track of them to the extent that you really don’t understand their life anymore? it is weird to me that i don’t know what my non-houston friends are up to on a weekly basis anymore. i was reading carter’s blog this morning and saw that he and kent went to visit anit over the weekend and i had no idea. even when i talked to carter yesterday, it didn’t come up. it feels strange, the idea that perhaps it is inevitable. i wonder what anit is up to. we get older, we lose track, but some wonderings stay the same.
six: every time i go to type “six,” i end up typing “xis” and having to backspace and retry. i don’t know why.
five: chrissy is moving back to atlanta in a week and a half, and last night james and liz organized a going-away dinner for her. i am sad to see her go. we only saw each other once a month or so, but it was nice to just know that she was here. i tried to explain that feeling to someone, and i don’t know if they understood. maybe i’m the only one.
four: talked to nick yesterday. i needed that. then he suggested i spend my $500 on another trip to france. if only he knew how tempting that is…
three: i’m glad that my weekend of dogs is over. i left them outside today, despite the fact that it’s damp and i’m sure they’ll get all muddy, because i didn’t trust them in the house. anyway. it’s not that i minded taking care of them for the weekend, but the past three nights have been three of the most sleepless nights in my recent memory (even including the unsettling nights in february). the combination of three high-strung dogs and sleeping in a strange bed has led to some unsightly bags under my eyes. i can’t wait to sleep in my own apartment tonight.
two: i think we are all crazy in our own ways. it’s the quirks that distinguish us, or, “who we are is in the details.” maybe instead of trying to become less crazy, i should appreciate and seek out the people who recognize that it’s just something else that makes me unique. the way i see it, ron married buzz not because she’s perfect, but because he could accept and love her quirks.
i want someone who can accept and love the crazy in me.
one: still obsessing over that song. “every dawn split another day and in another day we weren’t so restless.”
zero: blast off.
