last night i fell into a typical sarah post-phone call mood. i think it’s probably not worth trying to talk to me when i’m in one of those moods, as carter likely discovered last night.
i called nick and was so happy to talk to him, but then i inevitably had to hang up. i always have to hang up, of course, it’s a fact of life and telephone bills. but i don’t ever like to hang up the phone with anyone i’m talking to who is far away, whether it be atlanta or france. so i hang up, and i’m so profoundly sad that nick’s not here, that i can’t wake up tomorrow morning, drive to work, and give him a hug.
sometimes i don’t understand why life has to work the way it does, why we meet people who come to mean so much, and then we lose them to time, and more often just to distance. there’s always the idea of “the one that got away”…but i think the idea applies to more than an ex or some person you lusted after. if i have one that “got away,” i have fifty. it makes me a little bit sad, but moreso, it just makes me wonder. what brings people together? and what makes them go their separate ways despite the relationship that has grown to mean so much?
yeah. it’s one of those days.
it was a weird evening overall. after work i headed out to gilruth to join debbie and jason in stuffing backpacks for underprivileged kids at local schools. that was fun, and they fed us–always a good thing. then i walked over to the softball fields to watch just a few minutes of the jetsons game, but ended up freezing my butt off for an hour and a half after chris left to get his car and i had to keep score for the team. it was cold!! yeah, yeah, it was fun though. but then i lost my earring. dammit.
then i came home and called nick, then talked to carter and probably confused him with my mood for a little while, then attempted to watch dawson’s creek that i had supposedly taped only i discovered that my vcr sucks. actually, i think my vcr is fine, i just have trouble figuring out how to set everything up now that i have digital cable and the channels all come through a box. you’d think it wouldn’t be that complicated, and it’s probably not…but i am dumb. finally i climbed into bed and just read for a while.
this entry sucks. i’m going to class.
