listening to: Dido, “Thank You”
“It’s not usually my style to send emails like this to more than one person at a time, but today I am making an exception. I write about being sad and depressed much more effectively than I do about being happy and grateful, so I apologize in advance if you find this too sappy, even though I’m trying not to make it so.
“Anyway, here are the top 3 (yes, only 3) things I realized this weekend:
- It is good that I decided not to stay at Tech for graduate school. Though I’ve only been gone for 4 months, it felt a little weird to walk around campus. I was rather surprised to find that I felt like I don’t really belong there anymore, not as a student. Also, this morning I tried to log in to acme, and found that my GT account has been deleted. That’s a good sign that I’m not expected on the doorstep of 225 North Avenue anymore.
- On the other hand, life outside of GT grad school would have been great if I’d stayed in Atlanta, because I would get to see all of you more often. It was really wonderful to see everyone, and I’ve never felt as popular as I did over the past four days when you all kept calling to see what I was up to. I wish I could have made the days even longer, and I’m sorry I couldn’t spend more time with each of you. Special thanks to those of you who drove me around town, and let me crash on your floors and couches.
- In the end, the fact that I’m crossing the country to go to grad school doesn’t matter, because I know that each time I come back to Atlanta, at least some of you will be there. And after this weekend, I now know that you guys make it incredibly easy to pick up right where we left off.
“Trying to put a ‘personal touch’ on an email being sent to 14 people is a difficult task, and I probably haven’t accomplished it here. In any case, I just wanted to let everyone know what a great weekend I had, and how much fun it was to spend time with each of you.”
Oh my lord, it is raining again. At lunch, I saw the sun and it brightened my spirits, only to have them dashed again when I glanced out the window a moment ago. When will it stop raining?
I’m playing the waiting game again today. Waiting for my sims to run. Waiting on the computer. In a half hour or so, I’ll be done with wording my exit pitch and making most of the slides…and then I’ll just be waiting, waiting for my runs to finish so I can include the data in my pitch. Dry run tomorrow. Final presentation on Friday. Three days next week to document everything I’ve done so that the other co-op knows where to pick up and what to do.
Nick just brought me Reese’s cups and said he missed me over the weekend. We see each other only in passing during the day, but when one of us is missing, the day feels a little emptier.
I told him I’m ready to go to California. Karen wrote something in her journal the other day about how she was ready to “retreat to the safety of academia.” I feel it too. I’m ready to get back to class. I’m very nervous that I won’t be able to keep up, but nevertheless, every bone in my body is yearning to break free of this boring beige desk and these drab halls and get back to school. Life feels more normal to me when all the days are something different.